If you want to win...

Click Here.
She has yummy recipes, one of which I recently made.
I entered...so I hope to also win:)

Stolen Valentines.

This idea is completely stolen by me, and recently written about by this friend (for - real this time:).

I know, pretty lame of me to pirate her idea so soon...but I started rambling different ideas in my head, and felt like if I didn't share them this way, I probably never would.

Thanks for unknowingly letting me use your beautiful idea Ash.

Six Words that describe "I Love You" to My People I love.

Unexpected turns; I still want forever.

Your strong core has saved me.

Would never change one little chromosome.

Love is better when said aloud.

Love is perseverance, forgiveness, and trials.

Need you still, my young protector.

So much life yet, don't hurry.

Strong, unique, beautiful. Quite the trio.

(And Marilyn, although not pictured:)

You're son is my favorite world.

Happy Loving to all of you.

Roll the Dice.

Parenting is such a crap shoot, don't you think?
Sometimes I roll big and win, and sometimes I roll a seven and lose it all.

I get the opportunity professionally, to see parents interact and discipline their children very frequently. I see parents in vulnerable positions, hearts on their sleeves, ready and willing to do anything to help their children. Unfortunately I also see the opposite; parents who are too self-absorbed to see past their own needs and into their babies' eyes. As much as I disagree with the latter, I try my hardest not to judge. Heaven knows I've been too self-absorbed/lazy to be a parent more often than I'd like to remember. I can only hope my children will be more forgiving of me than I am of myself.

Abby is only six, and in these few years, that have seemed to zip past me, it's hard to even remember a time without her. I've been both types of parents: overindulgent and self-absorbed, but hopefully most of the time...somewhere in the middle. I know that she knows she's loved and important, and feels confident (sometimes too confident) enough to express her feelings and needs to us. I guess that's all I can hope for.

Today, I got to help with her class Valentine party; and Deakon wasn't invited. Her eyes lit up when I walked into the room, and my heart smiled. She even hugged me. She is so proud that I get to be the counselor at her school, it is one of the only things she freely compliments me of, and loves that all her classmates know my name. Compliments and tokens of appreciation coming from anyone else are lovely, but nothing beats the bright green eyes and half smile of my little girl. Those moments are the ones I just want to keep fresh. I want them right in front of my brain the next time I am tempted to lose it, the next time I think it is easier to give in rather than give up. Nothing is worth more to me than my relationship with my children and husband.

Abby was particularly helpful and sweet today; she mopped floors, dusted railings, fed her brother, and made his day by playing with him. She also spoke gently, discussed who the Bachelor kicked off with me, and learned how to cross the monkey bars (a HUGE fear) this past week. So, maybe that is why I am feeling somewhat compelled to love on her a bit tonight. I don't know, either way, I just want to keep my moments with her today and this week from going stale.

Official Boycott.

So, like every other parent in America, I have entered my kids' pictures in the Gap Casting Call Contest every year; only to be totally pissed off with Gap's apparent lack of clarity when defining beauty ...

Come on. You can't tell me that kid did not deserve to win.

Now - I am done. I am boycotting them, at least for a week. Feel free to join in. And, in honor of the true winner...I will post a few shots that just might make them cry in regret.

He's not afraid of close-ups.

Or, showing some skin (or maybe in this case, and every case actually, his belly is just bigger than his shirt).

And he LOVES the camera.

(*In the spirit of equal child loving, I attempted to get pictures of Abby. Those attempts were met with strong words and speedy exits. Equal opportunity was given.)

Dear Abby,

Could you PLEASE...

*... refrain from attempting to show your entire class the very anatomically correct parts of your High School Test Baby during Show and Tell? (I wondered why I had a phone call at home from her teacher last Friday - no message though...hmmm...how would that have gone? Good thing her teacher has a sense of humor.)

*...maybe attempt another phrase when asking Maddi and her girlfriend "What the Hell they are doing?"

*...cut down on the chit chat, and take longer than five seconds to complete your work in class? (I know you're smart...just try to make it at least look like you're attempting to accomplish something other than figuring out what game you are going to play at recess during class.)

*...think of something other than..."Well, you feed me" - when asked on a school assignment what you like best about your family.

*...choose another book, other than The Trip (aka...the 1st book in the 1st grade series of books - basically those are the only words in the book) as your favorite.

*...and then, when asked by your teacher during Parent/Teacher Conferences why The Trip is your favorite book; say something other than, "Well, it's the shortest."

OH....and did I mention I am the school counselor at her school?

Yes, I love this girl, but I am not sure where she came from.

Cheerz and Beers

Or Maybe Sippy Cups...

But, whatever.

In our house we prepared for the "Holiday" (as Blair refers to it as) of the Superbowl by...

1. Watching my little sister, Maddi, cheer with her Cheerz Team in a Competition on Saturday.

They did awesome, and Abby loved every second of it.

2. Creating a "Safe Zone" for Deakon where only Abby could control him - while I cooked.

3. Dressing our dolls in appropriate attire.

And...of course eating.

Now, I am lame and didn't actually pull out my camera during the actual party - so I'll create a visual for the rest of evening that may be reminiscent of your parties:

-Full Bellies.

-Broncos Jersey's; even though they didn't make the playoffs and basically don't have a lot going for them at the moment (Sorry Blair...it's true.)

-Colorful adjectives and usage of explict words

(including one from my own daughter...don't ask...)

-More eating.

-Little Movement.

Even Deak succumbed to the pressure during the fourth quarter and totally bailed to watch Yo Gabba Gabba in peace.

What a game huh?

Cup and Show.

That's it.

That is all my son wants right now...A drink and "Yo Gabba Gabba."

And basically, he is kind-of being a butt-head about it.

We started using a picture-based communication system with him recently. We thought this would allow him to feel a little less frustrated, and we would be able to know what he wants, without him having to scream for it. Since I have begun working a little harder at implementing it at home...his verbal skills have totally disappeared, and not because they are forgotten. I pretty much think he wonders why in the world he would try to talk when he can point to a picture, say "Ah" and get things handed to him. Each time the cards are pulled out he responds by hitting the "Cup" and "TV" card. When we ask him if he wants a drink and show...he always says, "Ah." (As in...you stupid idiots....that is all I ever want....leave me in my peace....put food/drink in range of motion, not requiring lots of effort....and I will be cool all freaking day.) He hasn't ever been one to go the extra mile just for kicks, he is usually pretty chill to sit back and let everyone else do the work. So...pictures just happen to fit fabulously into his scheme.

Many of you who know me, know that I am not really one to let him get away with his laziness. Unfortunately for him, he has a perfectionist for a mother, and also unfortunately for him, I tend to stew about things until they are resolved. Over the past couple of days I have probably spent a good amount of hours saying, "MaMa" in an attempt to get him to say something back. Last night, while saying "MaMa" fourteen million times a couple inches away from his face, like a crazy person, he finally put his little lips together and said it back.

He then doubled over with laughter, and a smirk that was probably deserved of a butt-whooping.

A few more examples of his evil plan to get the world to do all the hard work for him:

*While at his newly introduced and very fun Kindermusik class this past Monday, he was given some sticks to bang together. Deakon loves banging...bangs all the time at home. Well, at class he decided to be more interested in eating the instruments, which would've been okay, except for the fact that if I stopped banging my sticks together for a millisecond, he would hit my leg, and yell..."Ah!" (aka: get working lady.)

*He was a terror at therapy today...again. Nothing was okay with him. He just wanted to scream and yell and piss everyone off. He did actually do some of the work, he just yelled the entire time. (It also doesn't help that the Golden Child of Goodness happens to have therapy in the same room, at the same time. I think his mother must think I am a certifiable.)

*He recently was assigned a new physical therapist to come to our home, and he is working her over like there is no tomorrow. He is not dumb...he has had therapists coming to our home since he was three months old. He knows exactly why they're there, and he knows it involves work. So, upon meeting the new one, he played real innocent, grabbed her hand and proceeded to make her push all of the buttons on his toy. When she tried to get him to push a button, he would simply just grab her hand and make her do it. She responded by saying, "I think he and I will work well together." I agreed, but also thought..."Yep you will..especially if you do it all."

So, I know, you all are going to think I should cut him some slack. He's two...and two brings lots of tantrums. In fact, when Ab was two, all she wanted to do was hold her sippy, and watch Dora...so Deak aligns real well with what I already know.

But, truthfully, I don't think it would do him good; I won't allow him to cheat himself. For him, timing is crucial, and life is moving forward. My heart breaks, because I see daily how much harder he has to work, and he has worked so freaking hard to come as far as he has. And, that is why the Hiatus from life is not happening for him.

So, my Deak, you might not love it all now...but, when you read this as a grown man, I hope you understand that I pushed you because my whole heart is invested in you. My field of vision clearly sees the path you are capable of acheiveing, and I feel you are meant to offer truth to this world.

Sorry buddy...