Glasses are Way Cool

The thing I admire most about my Abby is the fact that she is very honest, and generally doesn't give a crap about what people think. She loves Pirates and has never been afraid to share her love with her girlfriends who are typically freaked out by her rapid collection of Davy Jones characters. She is who she is, and is really comfortable with herself.

I remember my parents making fun of me when Abby was really little, because I always had frank discussions with her when she asked questions. (Imagine discussing feelings with a one-year-old; I didn't get very far). I have always just wanted to teach her to be a kind person...nothing is more important to me than that, and she knows that. On the other hand, nothing has ever been "taboo." For example, when Abby was 3, she and I were watching some sort of show on TLC. On this patricular episode, two women were getting married. Abby turned to me and asked, "Mom, why are two girls getting married?" I was caught off guard and a little stumped as to how to answer her appropriately. Having a close work associate at the time who was gay, I really wanted to give her an answer that appeared non-judgemental without conveying undying support for the case either. So, after all this thinking I replied, "Because some girls decide to." (I know, incredibly smart right?) Abby remarked, "Wow. That sounds good to me." I thought, I guess at age 3, it would sound pretty good. Two princesses is better than one in her mind.

Anyway, Fast Forward a few years - and I have a little girl who comes home from school and proceeds to give me exact details of her day. I love hearing, and am glad that she feels comfortable enough to talk to me.

This was our conversation today:

Abby: "Mom, Rachel (her darling little friend at school) said that all the girls don't like the way she looks because of her glasses."

Me: "Well, that makes me sad. What did you say?"

Abby: "Nothing. Well, I actually told her that I liked her better with her glasses on because with them off her eyes are kind-of shut." (aka squinting:)-Again she is very honest)

Me: "That was really nice of you, I bet that made her feel good."

Abby: "Whatever. I sat with her on the bench at recess too because she wore a church dress and couldn't climb the snow towers."

Me: "That was really nice." (As I was trying to not seriously cry)

I know, this may be a minor thing to all of you. But, I work in an elementary school and see the absolute crap that our kids have to put up with on a daily basis. I also have a paticular soft spot for any child who may have something about them that makes them different. It has amazed me to watch Abby's sense of empathy grow since the birth of Deakon. She is such a wise little spirit who is so perceptive of others' and their feelings. (When we came home from attending the Chromosome 18 Conference this summer, she created a song entitled, Ring 18 is the Best Syndrome!)

I don't think I have done a very good job in a lot of ways and I know I have a long way to go as a mom. But, today, for a few moments, in between the talking back and drama, I felt like maybe I have done one thing right. Now, if I could only get her to stop asking for shoes every time we go to Target.